Wednesday, May 11, 2011

American Idol -- Top 4 Performance Show

Just so you know, no one but Haley is getting any points tonight. Friggin' J-HO!

James Durbin (Don't Stop Believin') – Dumbest song choice ever. It's possible that this song has been sung more times than any other pop song in the last 30 years. Then, he did it with the standard, done-a-million-times arrangement. Then, he didn't even sing it perfectly. Then, the judges blew more smoke up his ass. People who should know better letting other people think they are doing something great when they actually suck is how films like The Next Best Thing and Gigli get made. 0

It's getting to where I shouldn't eat before I watch this show because invariably I just want to hurl as soon as the judges start talking.

Haley Reinhart (Earth Song) – This was Kelly Clarkson good. She keeps getting better and better, to the horror of Hopez and Jackass. They were so intent on bashing her that Randy kept trying to shout down Steven Tyler when he was saying she did well. 99

Scotty McCreery (Where Were You When the World Stopped Turning) – This may or may not have been good. I seriously didn't hear any of it because I was in complete shock from what took place right before it. 0

Lauren Alaina (Anyway) – Eh. I liked the dress. 0

As if they hadn't done enough to destroy her chances, first Randy says that the first round was a three-way tie between James, Scotty and Lauren. Kiss my ass. THEN, they change the order of the second round so she has to go first. Let's rattle the hell out of her, then make her come right back out on stage so she'll completely crumble.

Haley Reinhart (I Who Have Nothing) – UN FREAKIN BE FREAKIN LEIV FREAKIN A FREAKIN BLE! Just think about this for a second. You've just had two of your bosses basically tell you you're a piece of shit for 15 minutes. Then they tell you you have ten seconds to get your shit together or you can go home. And you come up with THAT? That's money! Brilliant. I wanted to cry for her. 150

Scotty McCreery (Youngblood) – Whatever, dude. You can't touch that. 0

Lauren Alaina (Trouble) – For about the first 30 seconds I thought she might actually do something that would make me think of something other than Haley for just a moment. But then she fizzled into mediocrity. 0

James Durbin (Love Potion #9) – Remember how big a James fan I've been all season when you read this. What the hell was that? His pre-song clip was longer than any other contestants total time on screen tonight. Then he got to do the extended mix of the song. And as for them telling him he's peaking at the right time? Umm, only if the right time was two weeks ago because the last two weeks he's been barely above eh. 0

Of course if the judges had their way, the bottom three tomorrow night would be Haley Reinhart. Since they will probably only have a bottom two, it will probably be Haley and Lauren. If there is any justice, the person going home will be Lauren.

Sorry about the blog post. I'm still so angry I can barely think.

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